For the longest time ever, I’ve been meaning to write about this. It only hit me quite recently when I joined a conversation at my home church. To put things in perspective, I’ll center on two things.
The first is something that is quite unsettling, uncomfortable and disorienting to some extent. CHANGE. Many have taken active steps to familiarize themselves with this concept (myself included), but somehow it hits hard and unexpected. It comes to us when we’ve already planned ahead, structured our hearts and minds alike, settled well in our various ‘bubbles’ and even taken decisions with such long-term effects.
I’ve experienced a number of changes in my past. Both positive and negative ones to which I’ve either responded in quick succession or wallowed in distress (which by the way is such a dire waste of time). My most recent blow has come in the form of my church taking a decision to relocate. For a long time now it’s been to my convenience. I mean close proximity to home, ease of access, familiar community and so much more. It’s been just right – for me.
When I first heard of the move, I was down-right upset. Why? I’d been comfortable. The way I was doing things was just fine. The communication was done formally in a meeting (which I attended) and so I took keen interest. After listening to the underlying factors, reasons and what-not, I had a complete change of heart. I was actually zealous in anticipation and learnt that the purpose for the move was way bigger than my miniature reasons to stay.
That’s the thing. Change is often bigger and healthier than we think it to be. Only in quick acceptance and timely adjustment do we realize just how unhealthy the complacency was. We realize the deceiving nature of content. And this applies in every bit of change- relationships, moving geographically, being fired from a job… (I could go on).
The second item is the title of this entry ‘people relationships.’ Of course with such a move comes financial need. So I walked up to one of the pastors after the meeting. After a short debrief on it in general, we discussed the money part. I was completely baffled as to how we could possibly raise the needed amount in such a short period of two months!
I guess he could sense my unease and went ahead to explain a concept. One that applies to money and further than that, life. It’s one of sphere’s and people relationships. Let’s use an A-B illustration, shall we? Say person A can control (for lack of a better word) B’s decisions and actions to a large extent, B is in A’s sphere of control. These are people such as mentors, coaches, pastors, teachers (Get the gist? Basically people we look to). In the case of money, say A influences B to take up fund raising. B asks a couple of friends X to contribute a certain amount in their capacities. B is in A’s sphere of control and X, being B’s friends are in A’s sphere of influence. If friends X then take up the challenge and go ask their friends Y to do the same, Y friends become A’s sphere of impact.
Summary: You are in my sphere of ‘control’ (meaning I can influence your decisions to a large extent); your friends are in my sphere of influence and your friend’s friends are in my sphere of impact. It’s a leadership concept echoed by one Pastor Allan Kefa.
This is how we make a difference then – people relationships. It’s of no use burning bridges, for it comes a time we all will need each other to make this world a better place. So there we go… Deal with change and make friends. We achieve so much more together than apart.
Till next time!